I Support Barry Bonds

I support Barry Bonds. Somebody has to, and it might as well be me. And you should too. Now before you condemn me to walk a plank straight into McCovey Cove, hear me out.

Yes, I think Bonds used steroids. But I also believe Roger Clemens, Lance Armstrong, Evander Holyfield, Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa did too. So what?

Now I’m not here to make excuses for this guy. I just feel for him. He came into the league a skinny base-stealer. 13 Hat sizes later he’s approaching the “most hallowed record in all of sports” (Gee, whoever wrote that line must be a billionaire) and it has angered traditionalists everywhere. Most of the people outside of Rice-a-roni’s birthplace don’t want him to break the record… or so they say.

Everywhere Bonds goes, he is a star. He’s the only reason almost every away game he goes to sells out. The only guy who’s been at this level in my lifetime is Michael Jordan. The difference is that everywhere he goes instead of being cheered, he’s booed. And while everybody claims to hate him, they’re giving him no reason to stop using steroids because they’re there at the games.

Every time a fan boos his actions, every negative quotation of his they put in newspapers, every tell-all book that comes out, every person that states that they won't be there Bonds indeed does break the record; it all adds to his persona as the perfect super-heel of sports, and we needed that.

It actually surprises me that Bonds doesn’t get more love. After all, don’t you get tired of always cheering for the good guys? I for one am. It feels good when you’re wearing a Yankee jersey while your team beats up on the Milwaukee Brewers. And anybody with an “Austin 3:16” t-shirt in their hamper should know the feeling too. Sometimes you just get tired of the superhero. It gets old. But people like Barry are the types of guys that pave the way for the world to love A-Rod and Albert Pujols when they surpass Bonds.

So what! Bonds cheated. How does that affect you? His destroying of his own body means little to nothing in your life. But when he hits that record-breaker, that’s something you’re going to tell your easily influenced 6’6” 300 lb. homerun-hitting grandkids. Why don't you try teaching them the difference between right and wrong before you go blaming Bonds and Marilyn Manson for their roid rage.

All of you who blame him for using steroids have only yourself to blame. Don’t put it on Air Bud Selig who really just played the hand he was dealt. Homeruns saved the game. It brought that casual fan back and it’s the reason we don’t look at MLB like we look at the NHL today.

Yeah, Bonds may not be the most sociable guy. But hey, neither is Russell Crowe. He may not be the ambassador that Michael Jordan was, but that’s his own prerogative. He doesn’t need to be the Cliché-spewing, team-first player we all think we love. Yet it’s the Bonds’s and the Owens’s of the world that have paparazzi noting their every like they were Princess Diana. You the fan have made him into what he is, not steroids.

I turned on SportsCenter the other day and I saw that Bonds went 1-3 with a walk and two strikeouts. Doesn’t that just say it all? Not only do they show every Balco-induced homerun, but they also show every Barry-induced strikeout.

So hate him for disrespecting the media. But also hate Tom Cruise and Mel Gibson for doing the same. Hate him for hitting steroid-aided longballs. Just don’t forget to do the same for Sammy Sosa.

But if you ask me, I think most people just hate Bonds because they love to hate him, and nothing else. And homerun record or not, he’s putting asses in the seats of Miller Stadium. And I don’t think even Michael Jordan could have done that. Because Michael Jordan made himself into what he was. With Bonds, we created the monster.