Stop Getting the Knicks Fans Riled Up!

Apparently the Knick fans aren’t alone in wishing the team back to the NBA elite. With the free agent season just around the corner, the rumor mills have bounced around the Knicks name like Jessica Simpson on a trampoline.

First it was Pau Gasol. Then it was Kevin Garnett. Then Jermaine O’Neal said he wanted to come here. Vince Carter too. Chris Webber wanted to come here last year in Philly when it seemed as if his career was on the wrong side of the hill. Homegrown psychopath Ron Artest is a virtual lock as soon as Sacramento decides he’s not a good influence on Mike Bibby. Word is Kobe Bryant apparently wants out of LA, La la unless West comes back west. And look whose team has come to the forefront? That’s right, your New…York… Knicks! (Brings me back, it really does.)

And that was only this off-season. Don’t forget that Lebron, D-Wade and Carmelo are headed here after their three year contracts are done.

So let me get this straight. So according to these rumors, the Knicks will have a starting lineup of Wade, Kobe, Lebron, Garnett and Jermaine O’Neal? Sounds good to me!

But oh wait… how are we supposed to get these guys?

I don’t want to hear that it’s because of the money. If we figured out a way to trade for Tim Thomas, trade Nazr Mohammed for an overpaid, undersized Malik Rose, and overpay for Jerome James there HAS to be a way!

But now I have to stop being a Knick homer for a minute. Honestly, these are superstars, and even if they are content with $5 million veteran exceptions in exchange for all the endorsements, their agents certainly aren’t. I mean, as high-paying a city as New York is with our Yankees, Mets, Rangers and Knicks, you don’t see the best player in their sports playing here. (Alex Rodriguez is about as close as we’re going to get, yet we’ll never appreciate him until we’re describing him to our grandchildren.)

In fact, instead of a collection of highly-paid superstars, the Knicks are more like highly-paid second-tier players. Not to take anything away from them, though. If I was going to be paid 10-times less than the salary Jerome James gets I’d be happy. And you would too. But it shows just how desperate teams can get. There aren’t exactly enough superstars to go around, not even to New York.

The problem is that if these superstars were so willing to come to New York and play under the microscope of two major tabloids, non-stop coverage from ESPN and ChewThemOut.com ;-) then they would.

So if Garnett wants to play alongside Marbury again, I’m certainly not standing in his way. It would probably make his wallet extra large and either way make or break his legacy. If Isiah could somehow make amends with Larry Legend and figure out a way to swing a Stevie Francis for Jermaine O’Neal deal, then by all means… PLEASE DO IT!

But I’m getting tired of rumors circulating every day about possible Knick acquisitions with nothing coming out of it. When Kobe Bryant’s limousine door swings open and he steps foot onto the New York City pavement as a New York Knick, believe me, I’ll be one of those people there screaming like a girl at a Jason Paderon column reading. (Or a Justin Timberlake concert, whichever gets the point across better.)

But until that day, I’m just going to have to live with the fact that it’s still Jerome James stepping out of that limo. Not that I care though, I’ll still be there screaming my brains out. I’m a Knick fan.


Jason Paderon is a co-founder, columnist, and cartoonist for ChewThemOut.com. Additionally, he was a news reporter for the Staten Island Advance. He can be reached at paderon@chewthemout.com.