For without him, I wouldn't know what to do with myself. Heck, I almost did steroids but now that I see what has happened, it might not be worth it. I'll just work hard and do things the right way.Anybody who believed the previous is hereby banned from returning their stupidity to this website. We at ChewThemOut.com have enough problems. WE, in general, have enough problems. It's a good thing our government is taking out the time and money to assure us that every homerun hit will be the direct result of the weight lifting time gained from skipping classes in high school. You know, it's not like we're at war or anything.
After months and months of our tax dollars being poured into this 'revolutionary' investigation we see that the fruits of Mitchell's labor just happened to be, well exactly what happens when you eat fruit... crap. And did anybody else find it just a teeny (Barry Bonds') weeny bit suspicious that neither Mitchell's team (The Red Sox), nor the commish's team (The Brewers), nor the President's team (The Rangers) had no real superstars named? Not that Mitchell would omit anything, but perhaps he purposely didn't dig deep enough. Just a thought.
Oh what? You expected an in-depth report, delving into every user in a uniform? You expected Santa Mitchell to check his MVP list twice to see who had been naughty and nice? You expected ground-breaking stuff? OF COURSE YOU DID!
What did we get? A half-assed 6th-Grade level book report with two not-so-reliable sources, both in New York. I could have just read the Mitchell Report's first edition written by Jose Canseco.
So now we have maybe a quarter of estimated 'drug cheats' named, and even with not enough evidence to convict them in court, they've forever stamped the careers of 80 men with the Ecko Unlimited brand asterisk in the minds of fairweather sports fans everywhere.
And even those guys have either denied use or have only used once then stopped after all the guilt set in. What happened to the prolonged and excessive steroid abusers who's daily regimen's included taking more hormones in the butt than Richard Jefferson? (We hear the rumors RJ... we hear...)
Maybe that will be in the sequel.
3 comments:
Jeez, Mitchell. When you're paid to do a job, you're not supposed to do it half-assed. Now excuse me, I have lineups to adjust.
This steroid issue is a joke, and people doing a half-assed job is common. But not for nothing when im spending 100 dollars a ticket to see a baseball game i want to know that my favorite player is as good as he really seems to be. good night.
This steroid issue is really getting out of hand.
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